Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition Review – Full Priced Edition

Great game, awful product.

Developer: People Can Fly
Publisher: Gearbox Software (unaffiliated with G2A)
Format: PC, PS4 (reviewed), Xbox One
Released: April 7, 2017
Copy purchased

Bulletstorm was a great game back in the day, released as a big “screw you” to the modern military shooters that had flooded the market at the time. Despite featuring regenerating health and forcing players to wield only two guns, Bulletstorm‘s focus on skittish action and ludicrous violence won it a passionate fandom even if it didn’t perform very well in the sales department.

Indeed, Bulletstorm failed to make a profit and it seemed doomed to obscurity until Gearbox Software stepped in as the surprise publisher of Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition, a remastered version of what Epic Games once merrily backed.

Bulletstorm is a delightfully stupid shooter about tearing into armies of mutants and monsters with wanton abandon. Drunk space pirate Grayson Hunt – voiced to perfection by the ever-present Steve Blum – is tracking down the evil General Sarrano on a planet gone to shit, and he’s only got a bunch of oversized guns, a superhuman kick, and an energy lasso at his side.

That’s actually a lot of things, and he puts them all to vicious use.

Enemies are flung around the environment with Gray’s whip and bucked into the walls via his almighty boot while being torn to literal chunks by an assortment of assault rifles, shotguns, grenade launchers, and that one really cool weapon with the drills that send opponents flying. The world itself is full of things that aid in slaughter – electric cables, death drops, spike-lined walls – all waiting to fry, swallow, or impale any would-be attacker that comes Gray’s way.

The more punishing and inventive the death, the more points players earn, which in turn may be spent on upgrading and refilling the ammo of their weaponry.

Players are encourage to shoot, whip, and kick their way around a level, observing their surroundings and scouting opportunities for new and inventive deaths. While the game can be more or less played as an ordinary shooter, it’s both materially and psychologically rewarding to experiment and see just how sadistic things get.

Every single weapon has its own selection of “skill shots” that hold unique point values, and they’re all given appropriately silly names because Bulletstorm is, at its heart, a very silly game indeed.

Despite the constant dick references and frequent attempts at edgy humor, Bulletstorm tells an entertaining and almost touching little story about revenge with some genuinely likable characters. Even the villainous Sarrano – a mass murderer, a racist, and a genuinely loathsome individual – has some level of affability if just for his unrelenting audacity.

Bulletstorm remains a vastly amusing romp of butchery that maintains an impressive pace for the several hours it lasts. Under normal circumstances, this would be one of my more positive reviews, a glowing recommendation of a game that offers a throwback experience without being bogged down in dated ideas – a satisfying merger of the old and the new.

Unfortunately, somebody at Gearbox or People Can Fly decided a game that failed to turn a profit in 2011 could be rereleased six years later for the exact same price. With its MSRP of $59.99, Full Clip Edition quite literally double dips with a game over half a decade old.

Even worse, the heavily advertised Duke Nukem Bulletstorm Tour is not included as part of the basic package. Instead, it was used as pre-order DLC and then sold on launch day for an additional $4.99. Five bucks gets you additional content for a five-year-old game that, I remind you again, needs all the help it can get because the original sold really fucking badly.

Naturally I had zero interest in purchasing it but reports claim it’s awkwardly shoehorned into the campaign and Jon St. John sounds bored while reading his unfunny lines.

Although price is usually a factor in any review I do, it’s normally not of significant importance. Some short games can be worth just as much money as longer ones, and if length automatically added value, there are a lot of terrible games I’d be handing out awards to.

A remaster, however, is a different prospect. The artistry of it is second to its nature as a commercial product.

These are old games publishers rerelease specifically to try and make more money from old content. With that in mind, the value prospect to the customer has to be a more integral part of the critique, and Full Clip Edition‘s value prospect is dreadful.

While it’s not as insulting as the litany of things Activision’s done with Modern Warfare Remastered, it may represent the second worse way a remaster’s been sold.

The remaster itself, tragically, is really quite good. It runs beautifully in 4K at a smooth 60 frames-per-second, with characters and environments that still look striking today. Aside from some occasionally buggy ally A.I., it’s polished up nicely, and I wish I could say it was worth rushing out to buy.

At $59.99 however, with launch-day DLC besides, Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition is little more than a pisstake.

And that’s that.

5/10
Mediocre
Note: if you find this on sale for at least half the price, consider the score 8/10

HisDivineOrder
Guest
HisDivineOrder

I just don’t know why People Can Fly didn’t just go it alone, launch this without Duke, and price it at a Bayonetta-like $20. In that world, this is a great buy for gamers that missed it the first go-round. In this world, owners of the original release get this Steam-focused release for half off.

Massive sales, insane word of mouth, here comes Bulletstorm 2’s kickstarter…

Kyle Pierce
Guest
Kyle Pierce

The best part about this game is laughing at how stupid GearBox is while you play Bayonetta on PC instead.

Sned
Guest
Sned

I bet in a couple weeks time G2A will steal some keys and sell them for 29.99, effectively creating a very strange situation….
“The game is 8/10, but only if you buy from G2A….”

SpearmintTea
Guest
SpearmintTea

This seems weird. Is MSRP factored into every other review in the same way?

Terriosaurus Hex
Guest
Terriosaurus Hex

Gearbox seems to be the poster-boy of bad decision-making tainting good IPs, bad IPs and themselves. It’s like the clumsy, jam-covered kid who drops and breaks literally everything he touches, and when he gets close to your expensive shit, you have no option but to shout “just. fucking. STOP!! I’ll get it my bloody self! I’ll do it my damn well self…Just please stop…please??”

And that was only him trying to open your front door to leave.

mrhair
Guest
mrhair

I can pick up Bulletstorm for the PS3 for two bucks plus $4 shipping, is the thing. Are the remasters so good that I need to pay an extra $54 for them? Probably not!

Austin_sj
Guest
Austin_sj

Paid full price for the original version on PS3. Really enjoyed it. Not a chance will I pay full price again for a remaster.

Stephen Mc Devitt
Guest
Stephen Mc Devitt

It’ll lose value in a year’s time. Bulletstorm is gonna suffer again and not because people don’t want games like Bulletstorm, or think it’s shit, but because Gearbox’s name is inherently shit, and they made shit moves that make me wonder why aren’t they collaborating with Konami?

bimmyz
Guest
bimmyz
LegendaryFrog
Guest
LegendaryFrog

Such a shame because I really like the game. I didn’t buy it (Gamefly) due to financial restraints (college), but I will definitely pick it up if it drops to under $40.

Thanks again, Jim.

MeatMan
Guest
MeatMan

For PC players, you can currently get a Steam key for just under $32 from GameBillet, according to isthereanydeal DOT com.

I own the original game digitally on PC, but had problems due to shitty GFWL, so I only played it for a couple of hours before uninstalling. Regardless of how cheap the remaster gets on PC, I won’t be buying it, because it uses Denuvo DRM.

F-ck you, Gearbox.

Appretaur
Guest
Appretaur

If you publish through Gearbox, your game’s head will end up impaled on a Pitchford at some point or another.

Pangalaktichki
Guest
Pangalaktichki

I just reinstalled the original Bulletstorm on Steam, runs like a dream. Gearbox can fuck right off for not giving a cent of discount for people that already owned the game.

HaveSomeOatmeal
Guest
HaveSomeOatmeal

“You’re gonna shoot my dick off?!?”

ZeroAbbadon
Guest
ZeroAbbadon

I preorderd on PS4, it had a 15% ps+ discount and i freaking love the game, I’m not ashamed of that. I still find it kinda gross that gearbox has the gall to charge as much as they did but i never bought it new back when it first came out so i guess this is my penance.

Blagger76
Guest
Blagger76

Really enjoyed this game 6 years ago, which feels like 5 minutes ago, when you get as ancient as me. I’ve been hearing about server problems and matchmaking issues, this was a unfortunate feature 6 years ago! Disappointing they hadn’t sorted these issues out.

Anton
Guest
Anton

75% off on Steam in 3 months, almost guaranteed. Looking forward to it.

Edward Turvey
Guest
Edward Turvey

I was going to say that if you play on PC, just buy the original as it looks about the same or better depending on who you ask and will probably be cheaper, until I just discovered it has been removed from Steam and Origin to make way for this obscenely expensive, remastered version

Sjur Hansen Gaustad
Guest
Sjur Hansen Gaustad

Looks really hecking fun, gonna look for it on the next big Steam sale.

JonnyDoLake
Guest
JonnyDoLake

Yeah… 60$ for a remaster is just pure greed, particularly when compared to Bayonetta, which released on PC this week (you could call it a remaster) for 20$ and it’s a much better game.

Nobody's Fanboy
Guest
Nobody's Fanboy

Hey Jim,

Is there any word on whether or not it still requires GFWL and all kinds of other nonsense, or has that junk been cast to the pits of hell where they belong? It’s why I never bought a PC copy, but if that crud’s been removed then I’ll pick it up when it hits a steam sale.

jencaasi
Guest
jencaasi

I know I’m outraged by one of those scores. I’ll get back to you on which one.

BAH!
Guest
BAH!

Are you certain it’s a pre-order bonus, Jim? Because I saw it earlier in a store advertised (on the case) as including the extra content- in the form of a download code, naturally. Heaven forbid they actually put it on the fucking disc. But either way, I suspect it’s more of a “early run bonus” that some games have done. Still not great, obviously.

RedWolf
Guest
RedWolf

Well, guess I’ll look for this on sale. I like the look and sound of it, but 30 quid for a 6 year-old game is just taking the piss.

Barnacle_Britches
Guest
Barnacle_Britches

Two scores for one game!? You madman Jim! Well, I’ll be on the lookout for the 8/10 version. Which will clearly be better than Breath of the Wild.

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