Mad Max Makes Me Wonder Where The Australians Went

A new trailer came out today for Avalanche Studios’ Mad Max, and the general conversation consists of people wondering just how much it can live up to the masterpiece that was George Miller’s Fury Road. There’s little doubt the movie was a masterpiece of visual storytelling and themes that broke ground in its genre, and people are really hoping the game can survive the hype.

For me, however, I can’t get over one detail that many may find insignificant. At the risk of being accused of nitpicking, I am finding it difficult to deal with the voice acting revealed so far. Mad Max is set in Australia, the series itself is a hallmark of Australian cinema, and I’m left wondering… where the hell did all the Australians go?

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Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night Interview – Koji Igarashi Talks About His Possible ‘Magnum Opus’

After years of Konami clutching the keys to Castlevania and brooding like Dracula on his throne, Symphony of the Night creator Koji Igarashi is back to do what Konamisn’t – make an actual bloody Castlevania game. Sure, it won’t be called Castlevania, but Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night is going to be more authentic than anything the “rights holder” could hope to squirt out these days.

With Kickstarter as its lifeline, Bloodstained smashed its $500,000 funding goal and currently sits pretty at over $2,000,000 – with weeks of potential funding left to go. I backed it myself – out of sheer spite towards the “AAA” game industry – and am proud to present an interview with Mr. Igavania himself.

We talk about the risks of Kickstarter, Japan’s shift towards mobile gaming, and why Bloodstained could very well be Igarashi’s “magnum opus.” Enjoy!

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Why The Witcher 3‘s sprinting NPCs Are Important

It seems I was not the only one to be excited about NPCs in The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt allowing their pace to be set by the player.

We’ve all been there. Many roleplaying or action games feature quests in which a non-player character must be followed. Usually, these characters stroll along with you having to stroll after them, allowing them to spew their exposition or even just walk in mute languidness. The Witcher 3, however, does things a little different, and it’s a damn revelation.

It’s such a little thing, but more than a few people online are freaking out about it, and with good reason!

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The Witcher 3 review coming soon, but check out these FUCKING masks

Okay, so I’m working on a review for The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt but I didn’t get the code until a few days ago and it’s basically a million years long. However, as I stated in this week’s Jimquisition episode, I can confirm there are masks you may buy, and Geralt will wear them like a bloody great idiot. It’s brilliant.

It later turns out that these masks are part of a mission, but I didn’t need to fulfill that objective when the time came because I found them earlier and bought them all, yelling excitedly as I did. Obviously I did.

If I’d gotten the PC version of the game like I wanted then I’d have made lovely screenshots for you. Instead, I frantically took shitty pictures with my phone, my fingers shaking with mask-flavored anticipation. God, I fucking love masks.

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Crabs With Udders

Okay, so technically this isn’t related to videogames in a direct sense. I know, I know, I’m betraying everything I stand for and will soon be reviewing Game of Thrones episodes in a desperate bid to keep an audience!

It’s not that bad though, and it does involve Jimquisition fans doing something ridiculous just because I mentioned it in a video.

See, I was playing Shrooms on YouTube and talking about crabs with udders. I thought about crabs with udders because I misread something while playing Selfie: Sisters of the Amniotic Lens that made me think about crabs getting milked.

Anyway, I was discussing how impractical it would be, see, to have an Uddered Crab. The udder would be swollen underneath, engorged with delicious Crab Milk, while its little legs would be lifted off the ground. It’d need to be milked, but crab pincers are too sharp to tug at sensitive, lactating teats. So, we’d need another animal – chiefly a seagull with fingers where its beak should be. That’s obvious genetic sense.

At any rate, I jokingly mentioned at the end of my Shrooms video that someone should draw a crab with udders. People did. Lots of people. Lots of ridiculous people. The talent and dedication to silliness was too good to not preserve somewhere, and this is really my only outlet for it. So here we are – at least somewhat born from a game conversation and therefore somehow maybe game-related – a gallery of crabs with udders.

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Yooka-Laylee Interview: PlayTonic Games Delivers A Rare Treat Indeed

Yooka-Laylee‘s success has been staggering. Within forty minutes of launching on Kickstarter, this “Rare-vival” from PlayTonic Games reached its funding goal while the cash keeps pouring in. A spiritual successor to Banjo-Kazooie, featuring a team of former Rare colleagues, Yooka-Laylee arrives in a world where mascot platformers are “dead” and publishers tell us we’re not interested in cute, colorful collect-a-thons anymore.

Despite the erasure of such games from the so-called “AAA” industry, it seems there are many, many gamers out there with a hunger for PlayTonic’s offerings, and a willingness to support it with cash – myself included. Yep, I happily backed this one myself, because any resurrection of a genre that sticks it to corporate, focus-tested mandates is something I can get behind. Igavania says hi, by the way!

I got to speak to the team at PlayTonic about the project’s success, the upcoming challenges, worries from fans, and a whole lot more. It’s real good reading, settle the bloody hell down and get reading as I chat with Chris Sutherland, Gavin Price, Steve Mayles, Jens Restemeier, Steven Hurst, and Mark Stevenson – practically the whole flippin’ team!

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D4 Interview: Swery65 Keeps Dark Dreams Alive On PC

Swery65 is something of a hero of mine. The brain behind Deadly Premonition, this goodhearted eccentric from Access Games is responsible for a game that has had more of an impact on me than perhaps any other piece of interactive entertainment. His Twin Peaks inspired open-world horror game blended humor and abject oddity in a way that almost defies description. I once described it as akin to two clowns eating each other – something so very, very wrong, but morbidly funny and arresting in its intrigue. It was lightning in a bottle, something I didn’t think Swery could pull off again.

D4: Dark Dreams Don’t Die proved me wrong. As weird and hilarious as its predecessor, D4 brought Access’ unusual storytelling to the Xbox One with aplomb, demonstrating that Swery65 knew exactly what he was doing and Deadly Premonition  was no fluke. Unfortunately, its marriage to the ill-fated Kinect, not to mention Microsoft’s carefree launch, did not bode well for the game’s market chances. D4 was not quite the underground hit Deadly Premonition was, and it looked like the episodic title would end its story on a cliffhanger.

Dark dreams, however, really are hard to kill – Swery recently announced that D4 was headed to PC, this time without the shackles of Microsoft, and it’s primed to not only get a second chance at success – a whole lot more content looms on the horizon. I had the pleasure of chatting with Mr. 65 about the upcoming Dark Dreams port, his work on the Xbox One, and the ambitious future for the D4 series. Enjoy The Jimquisition’s first ever interview!

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What’s Really Really REEEEAAAALLY Going On In Bloodborne

Much has been made of Bloodborne‘s mysterious and often confusing plot. What is the Night of the Hunt? Exactly how did the Healing Church come to be? What is the true nature of the Great Ones, and the sinister Chalice Dungeons from which they seem to have sprung? The city of Yharnam is an old and shrouded place, and like any good From Software title, it drips in history and lore. Recently, Rich Stanton wrote an excellent breakdown of the game’s plot, but as brilliant as his writing is… he’s simply wrong. Every theory I’ve ever read about the game is wrong, wrong, wrong.

Through extensive research and thinking about things while sat on the toilet, I’ve connected the dots and figured out what’s really supposed to be happening in Bloodborne. It’s a plot that spans multiple games – multiple franchises, even – and crafts an intricate spider’s web of plot threads and secrets. Director Hidetaka Miyazaki has created something truly mindblowing here, and I’m about to take the lid off the soup can!

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Metabombed: Battlefield Hardline is a ‘Piece of Sh1t’

After a tepid marketing campaign and a lot of cynicism from the audience, Battlefield Hardline finally slogged it to the finishing line and released this week. The critics’ response has been lukewarm to say the least, to the point where I’ve been one of the more positive reviewers on the block. Most of the big guns think it’s “okay” at the very best – a decent enough, but dated and tone-deaf shooter.

What do The People think of it, though? Well, we have a controversial installment in a huge big budget franchise, a new developer on an established IP, Electronic Arts as the publisher… oh my, this is mama’s classic recipe for Shitstorm Soup!

You guessed it – Battlefield Hardline has been Metabombed by user reviews, as gamers take to everybody’s favorite pissing contest stadium and give EA a piece of their angry, angry minds.

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I Might Review Ori and the Blind Forest When It’s Playable

As I write this, the title screen music from Ori and the Blind Forest is humming and plinking in the background, as it has done for quite some time. This is because, when I try to play Ori and the Blind Forest, it won’t load the game beyond this screen. I press the “A” button, as prompted, and nothing happens. I’ll admit it’s a very pretty piece of music, but is it worth not being able to actually play the bloody thing? Not really.

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