Podquisition Episode 20: Sex With A Man-Parrot

On this week’s intrepid audio adventure, we talk about having sex with cars and various were-animals, because why the heck not? We also discuss Jim’s three-day Dark Souls binge and what it’s done to his psyche, and TRY not to ramble on about Bloodborne again.

Also, Gav and Laura had been drinking prior to the recording. It’s actually surprising how non-obnoxious they are, because they’re professionals through and through. Still, Gav REALLY wants you to know he’s been drinking!

Rivenfire
Guest
Rivenfire

It’s not a job it should be a hobby!?!? I have a feeling that many corporations would easily agree. They would be in heaven, to say the least. Deciding who should get paid, regarding what is or isn’t considered real work!?!?! There’s a good sci fi horror premise!! “Next case Mr. Jim Fuc…I’m not going to pronounce that! Mr. Jim F. Sterling Son please approach the bench. According to our official testing, analysis, and other legal processes, which accurately and efficiently determine if any “Real” work exists FUCWA (First United Committee on Work and Credit) have concluded the following”…Just so… Read more »

HonkyTonks
Guest
HonkyTonks

No Final Fantasy butt will ever outmatch Ashley Riot’s buns of steel in Vagrant Story. Shown off with his convenient assless shorts.

On Playstation now.

ANTI-SANTA
Guest
ANTI-SANTA

Listening to Laura and Gav talking about energy drinks while Jim sadly mewls in the background about how much he misses caffeine was more amusing that it should have been.

Plips
Guest
Plips

Just want to say I don’t mind all the Bloodborne chat (besides the jealousy I feel as I don’t have a PS4) you guys always talk about plenty and as long as you remain as entertaining as you have been you can talk about whatever the hell you want. I do request that Laura plays a crazy sex game to talk about each week though. Seriously where does she find them all?

Mohamed
Guest
Mohamed

2 Thoughts I had while listening to this episode 1: Drunk Gavin should be default Gavin (unless he doesn’t want to be, obviously, I just thought it was fun to hear his opinions and have him be the one doing the interrupting) 2: remember when you guys played that weird rainbow song a couple of episodes back? I was thinking, why don’t you do that with every episode but using songs by Gavin. It would be a much softer end than saying bye then cutting to silence, and it would advertise the guy’s other work which is different from the… Read more »

Jester Maduin
Guest
Jester Maduin

Wait, I re-listened, was it “Smaki Świata”?

Jester Maduin
Guest
Jester Maduin

Wyborowa.
You were drinking Wyborowa.
Pronunced /vyyh-boh-roh-vah/.
Regardless of what flavour it claims it has, it will be just vodka.

Bjort
Guest
Bjort

I Demand (YES DEMAND) that we have more drunk/tipsy podquisitions. I want to hear Gavin talk!

Billy
Guest
Billy

On the topic of PCs with Bluray drives, I have a feeling they are fairly uncommon. PCs honestly don’t have much reason to have BD drives. Digital download was already growing strong before BD drives became particularly affordable, so games never moved to BD. More so, I would guess that the people most likely to buy physical PC releases in this age of digital download (and Steam authentication) are those who aren’t spending a lot of money on PC, and thus are the least likely to have a BD drive in their PC. I don’t believe burnable BD discs ever… Read more »

matt drew
Guest
matt drew

thanks for the spoiler warning after ruinig it? i guess

Ben
Guest
Ben

That car sounds alot like this guy who fell in love with his car

maybe it was the the inspiration
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0S642NtHtE

Dave Dogge
Guest
Dave Dogge

You didn’t mention Little Devil Inside … https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEjRTx_tvnE omg .. you have to at least mention this game … sometime … please..

TurboPhoenix
Guest
TurboPhoenix

You think your experience with the crow lady is bad Jim – I hit her the first time I encountered her back in Central Yarnham, and just fucked that whole storyline up. Later on in the game I went back and whupped her arse though, and used her armour and dagger through the majority of the game, so it was well worth it.

Alex
Guest
Alex

On the topic of animals and weird sex, this is quite an interesting view on the different kinds of ways in which different species of animals manage their mating and illustrates it with amusing little human pictorial analogues:

http://9gag.com/gag/aZP2zgz

Hans
Guest

Unfortunately for Laura someone has already tackled the snack foods coming to life genre: http://www.amazon.com/Cheesy-Puff-Came-Life-Pimped-ebook/dp/B00TVD8EDM/ref=pd_sim_kstore_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=1W4B6QR6FCJJB0YV8GPT

Chapomon
Guest
Chapomon

Why would having an all male party in the next Final Fantasy group cause controversy when Final Fantasy X-2 had an all female party? I don’t recall anyone complaining about that at the time or is this controversy a cause of the times we live with gamer sexism controversy every week? As long as any female supporting characters aren’t used as their “no homo” shield or as over used cliches, I think the gender issue will probably be overlooked…whether SquareEnix will do or succeed in that, that’s another story. As for Amiibos, that market will crash just like any other… Read more »

Teenspirit
Guest
Teenspirit

To clarify for all booze lovers – that alcohol Laura has been drinking doesn’t have 40%, just 25%. But you still can get smashed by it pretty quickly 🙂 https://www.frisco.pl/pid,43321/n,wyborowa-smaki-swiata-wodka-maracuja-crisp/stn,product

Anyway, great podcast, as usual. Waiting for more! And probably, if any of you had any contact with last Dragon Age: Inquisition DLC, a little bit your thoughts on that one.

Ty
Guest
Ty

I would make a Podquisition RPG in a similar vein to “Five Nights at Fuckboy’s”.

SilentPony
Guest
SilentPony

I saw DragonForce in Jeff City back in oh…2009 I think. They started with Cry Thunder, and they played an extra long intro. So instead of roughly 30sec of guitar rifts, it was closer to a min and a half.
Upwards facing flood lights turn on, whole band is silhouetted against the back wall. Stage fan turn on; hair is billowing, the crowd is rocking their heads. Everything is building to a fever pitch!
ZP steps forward. Opening lines and…

…they forgot to turn on the microphones. The crowd and band ended up laughing SO hard they had to restart the entire show.

astra
Guest
astra

every morning i go to youtube and bookmark videos to watch later or listen to while i do other stuff
and every time i see that the co optional podcast has a new episode i get so happy because i know theres a new podquisition up lol

good stuff

Greg
Guest
Greg

Hm. CDProject Red didn’t just announce their DLC; they’re already selling it on pre-order as a Season Pass. They’re not hard-selling it–in fact, they explicitly say, “Don’t buy it if you have any doubts. Wait for reviews or play The Witcher and see if you like it first. As always, it’s your call,” which is a very CDProject Red thing to do, but I still wish companies wouldn’t do this sort of thing. Especially because I emailed them to ask whether the expansions were stand-alone (e.g. Dragon Age Awakening) or would be integrated into the game, and they replied that… Read more »

sikuneh
Guest
sikuneh

Jim, make sure you use dsfix if you’re playing on PC. You can downsample and run it at 60fps. It lets you customize and improve the graphics.

Eureka
Guest
Eureka

Jim I fully agree with Gavin. Please record Blight Town. It is not that I enjoy seeing you suffer but it is actually totally that :P.

But for good sportsmanship, good luck with it ;).

Total-Haddock
Guest
Total-Haddock

You don’t HAVE to fight the ogre, you don’t HAVE to fight the dragon, They’re there as both an optional challenge and because it makes sense for these locations to have them; because it makes the world seem more real.
Besides, the dragon is really easy to beat, just run straight up to it and hit its legs.

tomming peep
Guest
tomming peep

I told myself not to buy Dark Souls 2 before I finish Bloodborne so I’ll probably play it in 2-3 years. 😛 damn you GOTY 2015. damn you RNG chalice dungeons.
Thanks for yet another entertaining podcast while I farm souls, Jim&Co. 🙂 Keep up the great work!