The Bullshit Roundup: Battlefield 1 and Deus Ex Get Microtransactions, Watch Dogs 2 Spams Us With Special Editions

Time for more stinking bullshit, delivered to you on an unwashed platter full of sick and blood. We’re here once more to bang on about the same old crap the “AAA” industry shoves down our throat, because lordy knows few other places bother.

On today’s edition of Bullshit Roundup, we’ve got two more cases of microtransactions announced for unreleased premium games, and Ubisoft is at it again with another ludicrous selection of collector’s editions for Watch Dogs 2.

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Tonight In Overwatch Loot Boxes

I’ve already explained why I think Overwatch‘s loot system is absolutely terrible. You’re welcome to agree or disagree (and many of you have been very vocal either way) but there’s one thing that cannot be denied, one universal truth that you must acknowledge.

I have the shittest fucking luck with these wretched things.

The header image is a collection of wet garbage that I obtained last week, but tonight was simply incredible. Three loot boxes painstakingly unlocked through play – three piles of complete toss.

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The Jimquisition: Pay To Spray – Overwatch And Microtransactions

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Overwatch is one of my favorite games of the year, but I cannot in good faith consider awarding it the title of “best” game.

My long-running policy of disqualifying premium games with microtransactions in them is consistently enforced, but it’s pissed off a lot of Blizzard fans.

As an attempt to bring understanding to such furious souls, I offer my full problem with Overwatch’s fee-to-pay mechanics and the failure of its loot boxes in general.

The Bullshit Roundup: Dark Souls Goes Dark, Microtransactions Of War, Quantum’s Broken

It’s been a while, but I’ve got a sack of bubbling bullshit to dump onto your dinner table like a feces-smeared Santa Claus. Yet more bollocks from the game industry’s sweaty crevices are yours to enjoy.

In this edition, we look at offline shenanigans with Dark Souls: Prepare to Die EditionQuantum Break‘s rubbish PC launch, and news that Microtransactions will be in Gears of War 4… because of course they will.

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Metabombed: Payday 2 Is “Utter Toilet”

By now you should all be well aware of the Payday 2 microtransaction controversy. After “shaming” us for ever believing Overkill would put premium currency in the co-op shooter, such currency was introduced as part of this year’s “Crimefest” event. It’s a move that has angered many.

After refusing to talk to press about the situation, brand manager Almir Listo blamed the press for not knowing enough about the situation, branding criticism as “clickbait” and painting his company as the victim. The studio has since included a chance to earn premium “drills” as free loot drops, though the chances of getting them seem quite slim.

Regardless of Almir’s protestations, the press is positively generous compared to what the community itself has been saying. To that end, it’s time to once again look at a game being METABOMBED as Payday 2 players vent frustration the only way they know how – via Metacritic user reviews.

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The Jimquisition: Pay Day

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Overkill has embodied its name when it comes to downloadable content for Payday 2, but its latest shenanigan is possibly the worst.

After adding a microtransaction system to the game in an event that promised FREE updates, Payday 2 has become not just a source of community rage, but an exercise in corporate hypocrisy.

This is a game I personally championed. I take its recent heel turn personally as well.

The Bullshit Roundup: Microtransactions In Tomb Raider And Halo 5, Star Wars: Battlefront‘s $50 Season Pass

A lot of bullshit happens in the game industry and I get inundated with references to this bullshit whenever it does. People want to see a new Jimquisition video every time the latest “AAA” game has microtransactions or some garbage downloadable content.

The main problem is, my video series often already has episodes that apply entirely to whatever new scandal has occurred, meaning all I’d end up doing would be rewording a prior video with some names changes.

However, it IS important to call this trash out whenever it happens. Since I no longer post on a news blog, I thought it’d be fun to do a semi-regular feature that collects the latest nonsense from major publishers and presents them with scorn. I may be beating the proverbial dead horse every time I do one, but I say the horse is alive as long as companies continue acting like cocks.

Please enjoy our latest editorial adventure, The Bullshit Roundup!

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The Jimquisition: Fee 2 Pay

With the imminent launch of Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, a fresh outrage has spawned over its inclusion of microtransactions. I love outrages about microtransactions, so much so that I coined the phrase “Fee To Pay” years ago.

Here we are again – the practice of “Fee To Pay” is more common, but no less distasteful. Let’s revisit the stupid world of “feemium” games, where you gotta pay… if you wanna pay.