Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle Review – Kingdom Karts

Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle is one of those game concepts that on paper simply should not work. Rabbids are essentially the late 2000’s equivalent of the Minions – screeching, vulgar, nondescript vehicles for fast-paced slapstick aimed at children. Mario is one of the most iconic video game characters of all time, who goes on focused and goal-oriented quests to save the world.

Neither use guns.

Putting both into a turn based strategy RPG shooter setting together simply doesn’t sound like a good idea on paper.

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You may have heard disturbing reports and written them off as hysteria and scaremongering. In fact, your concerns may have been alleviated by the so-called “officials” telling us to keep calm and carry on. Make no mistake, however – AMIIBOGEDDON is here, and we’re all going to suffer.

According to reports, Nintendo’s amiibo figures are growing scarce to the point of near-extinction. It’s already becoming next to impossible to secure the Wii Fit Trainer, Villager, or Marth figures, and the latest stories suggest no more are being made. These amiibo shortages are quite possibly going to lead us into another Great Depression, and neither Nintendo nor the government are doing anything to help. We’re on our own, people! We’ve been abandoned by our overseers, and ignored by our false gods. We’re in the middle of an apocaliipse, and all we can do now is try to survive. We really are The Last of Us.

Now is not the time to panic, however. Grab the amiibo you have, secure yourself, and prepare for the coldest winter of your God damn lives. Follow my tips for surviving AMIIBOGEDDON, and please… for the very sake of humanity… keep yourself alive.

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Dear Nintendo, I Would Like The Following Amiibo

So, Nintendo’s Amiibo seem to be a big hit. According to NeoGAF, the game-enhancing figures are proving difficult to pre-order, with reports that Best Buy, Target, and GameStop are unable to supply according to demand for the little plastic blighters. If you hadn’t already heard, an Amiibo is a little toy representation of a Nintendo (or related) character mounted on a Technology Base ™ that the Wii U’s GamePad can read. It’s a similar concept to Skylanders or Disney Infinity, but far more universal, since the interaction is built into the console and can apply to multiple games. To date, the figures work with such titles as Hyrule Warriors, Mario Kart 8, and Super Smash Bros.

I was a big fan of the Skylanders concept because I grew up in the 1990s, and there’s something so very 90s about the whole thing. Seeing Nintendo hop on the bandwagon is pretty exciting, and it’s cool to see it doing so well. Hopefully this means there’ll be incentive to expand the line to all sorts of characters and games, and with that in mind, I thought I’d get in early and make some official requests to Nintenders on behalf of us all. Here is my damn list of characters that should be turned into Amiibo, so I can buy them and own them and taste their exotic flavors.

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