Tonight In Overwatch Loot Boxes

I’ve already explained why I think Overwatch‘s loot system is absolutely terrible. You’re welcome to agree or disagree (and many of you have been very vocal either way) but there’s one thing that cannot be denied, one universal truth that you must acknowledge.

I have the shittest fucking luck with these wretched things.

The header image is a collection of wet garbage that I obtained last week, but tonight was simply incredible. Three loot boxes painstakingly unlocked through play – three piles of complete toss.

o1

So this was the first disappointment of the night. There’s a reason I call Overwatch‘s cuboid extinguishers of hope Spray Boxes, and you’re looking at it.

Just let your eyes drink in this worthless filth. Three sprays and a stupid profile logo that does absolutely fuck-all. They’re not even good sprays, either. They look like shit.

This is probably the worst Loot Box anybody’s ever had.

Still, there’s always next time, huh? It could take an hour if things go bad, but it’ll surely be worth it.

o2

NOPE!

Not a skin in sight, but it makes up for that with another useless fucking icon for my stupid fucking profile and TWO voice lines. Imagine if someone had paid for this box. Paid for a jpeg and a couple of mp3s.

Oh, and currency. A tiny amount of currency that shouldn’t even be in these stupid trash baskets.

It was at this point that I decided I’d write an overly dramatic article about the evening’s unlocks if the next Loot Box sucked.

o3

Oh huh, the next Loot Box sucked!

At the VERY least we got a skin out of the bargain, though I hesitate to call the more common low-effort recolors “skins” of any sort.

Also it’s for Widowmaker, a character I never play.

BUT HEY AT LEAST I’VE GOT TWO NEW SPRAYS SORRY I MEAN ONE NEW SPRAY BECAUSE I GOT A DUPLICATE!

AT LEAST I GOT FIVE COINS FROM THE DUPLICATE HA HA WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE ONE DAY!

If you think I’m flying off the handle just because I got three worthless unlocks in a row, please bear in mind that this is what nearly ALL of the shitting things have looked like for me since I started playing.

I’m level 33 now. That’s 33 rolls of the dice, and so far I’ve managed to uncover one single “legendary” skin for D.Va.

Beyond that, I’ve got a handful of the palette swap skins – and I mean a laughably small amount- with the rest being sprays and voice lines. Mostly sprays, because these are Spray Boxes.

Even if I was inclined to purchase microtransactions for premium games, I’d never consider doing it for this game. Not with such clumps of complete and utter wank being tossed before me like a fistful of severed dicks.

Anyway, that mildly annoyed me tonight.

SilentPony
Guest
SilentPony

Hey Jim, I’m thinking of grabbing a bottle of Gentleman Jack for games night. What do you guys usually drink on DND night?

Overlord Aeldarian
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Overlord Aeldarian

I like White Owl Spiced Whiskey, but thats just me.

Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

I don’t understand this idea of making people chose from a set list of avatars and sprays. Just let people use their own (well, they very rarely own the image, but you know what I mean) images. Sure people will occasionally use porn, but as we can see from existing games and services, it doesn’t happen so dramatically often as to warrant legitimate concern.

Steven Thomas
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Steven Thomas

It does when the game is trying to push into being an e-sport like Overwatch very much is. Having porn be available to just be in the game ends up damaging the view of the brand to certain consumers, and any company doesn’t (and rightfully shouldn’t) want that.

nicethugbert
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nicethugbert

Oh you just want to see more porn in game.

Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

Nah, I dont play overwatch. And thats unlikely to change unless its 70+% off any time soon

nicethugbert
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nicethugbert

I was kidding.

RIME
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RIME

Could be allocation of server space (imagine moving past a wall to see a buffering icon) and/or overhead needed for content moderation.

Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

and that would be a legitimate concern some 10 years ago or more. These days not so much.. I feel like if TF2 could handle people importing sprays (at least 5 years ago. Very probably earlier), Overwatch should have no problem

nicethugbert
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nicethugbert
Reminds me of Mass Effect 3 MP. I swore off Bioware games after that. But, to be fair, the loot crates in ME 3 MP did not reward cosmetics. They rewarded game play items. Warframe does the same crap. Never again. Smite has the same business model as Overwatch and I just don’t play the loot box scam. I play the game and ignore that crap. I have a healthy “relationship” to Smite. I play a match or three every couple of days, maybe double that some weekends and that’s great. No obsessions. It’s healthier that way.
JoYKiLL
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JoYKiLL

What do you mean Warframe does the same thing? Do you mean the daily reward for logging in? Because unlike Overwatch and ME3, Warframe is 100% free to play.

nicethugbert
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nicethugbert

Warframe is Wait Wall Extortion for game play items. Warframe has loot crates. Many people forget that because DE doesn’t promote it.

Warframe is not free once you spend money. Warframe is profitable. Someone must be spending money.

Elbows for Knees
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Elbows for Knees

You see, loot boxes are better than paid cosmetic dlc because that way you can sell people shit they literally don’t want. Soon Blizzard will start selling the games themselves in loot boxes. You’ll go to try to buy Diablo 4 or whatever the fuck and you’ll just end up with 3 copies of Blackthorne and a broken Lost Vikings cart.

Lloyd
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Lloyd

But they will generously buy them back for 1 Blizz Buck each, only 1000 of them and you can get the game you actually wanted!

Steven Thomas
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Steven Thomas

At this point I can’t tell whether you’re playing the game for the game, or to get loot boxes when you clearly have a dislike for them.

Nitrium
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Nitrium

Jim has made it pretty clear in a lot of dialogue that he not only loves the game but is also crazy about character cosmetics. Unfortunately he can’t unlock the cosmetics he actually WANTS for his beloved characters, only the shit that Blizzard randomly shits out. And even if you choose to pay real money, you STILL can’t be guaranteed to get the cosmetics you want because your real money only gives you more totally RANDOM loot boxes!

Steven Thomas
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Steven Thomas
I’m not saying that the loot boxes aren’t stupid, even though I feel they aren’t. What I’m saying is that Jim made his point once, it’s a valid and respectable point, and it’s the type of point that should only NEED to be made once in this particular case rather than kvetch and beat it into the ground. NOW, he’s going out of his way for it and he’s doing it in an entirely wrong manner. It’s clear that he only wants the rare stuff and doesn’t even regard that some of the lesser stuff might be nice (when some… Read more »
JoYKiLL
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JoYKiLL

I think, and I’m sure a few would agree with me, that he’s using hyperbole to get some chuckles from people and to vent his frustration a little. Y’all motherfuckers need jesus, calm down.

Artemiy
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Artemiy

*insert Jim’s video about silence here*

I think we need a specific tag for this.

Dan Squire
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Dan Squire

The ONLY complaint I genuinely have about the loot boxes are those bullshit amounts of currency you get for duplicates. Its just laughably inexcusable. There’s no reason to be that stingy, even IF you’re trying to get people to buy boxes.

Abdeel Morales López
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Abdeel Morales López

y u so mad 🙁

Rob
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Rob

I think that there are a lot of epic skins that look cooler than the legendary skins. The epic skins stick to the original aesthetic but make it different in a cool way without making it a new model. Also banana is Winston’s best skin.

qorl123
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qorl123

Epics are still just recolors.

Rob
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Rob

Ignoring that pharah’s epics have a different helmet and reinhard’s Bundeswehr skin isn’t wearing a helmet they are in my opinion the best recolors. The epic skins stick to the original model but do something interesting and new. For many characters I find the epics better than the legendaries. I think that the skins were done well and don’t make you wonder who the hell a character is. The reward system in overwatch is the problem because it’s a full cost game that uses a manipulative system to extort money from the player.

Gazatteer
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Gazatteer

They’re literally not, though? They’re re-textures. Some even have minor modifications to the model.

Jakub Nytko
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Jakub Nytko

Jim, how would you improve loot boxes? I have been following this drama ever since Overwatch launched and personally am somewhere in the middle on subject of microtransactions. Do you think guarantee loot like at least 1 skin of random quality, 1 spray, 1 voice line etc. would help? I can see the problem you are showing, it is troubling even for me who doesn’t care about cosmetics.

Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

A good place to start would be to ensure that every single possible item from the box is at least somewhat desirable to a decent amount of the player base.

Jakub Nytko
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Jakub Nytko

I’m going to refer to TotalBiscuit’s video who points out that “desirable” is a relative term. There are people who will find voice lines or sprays desirable. Just because you don’t, that doesn’t mean everyone else doesn’t either.

Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

Voice lines I can understand. I don’t play Overwatch, and unless its ever 70% off or more, I never will, but I mean, I’d pay for more TF2 voice lines, for example, because those are wonderful. Sprays though, I’m gonna need direct evidence of people liking them. The idea of only having preset sprays to chose from… it kinda defeats the point of sprays, in my opinion. It makes them utterly worthless. Maybe if there were enough of them for you to be unlikely to see the same one from different players.

Jakub Nytko
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Jakub Nytko

I prefer sprays over voice lines so there’s an example of one person who likes them.I grew up playing CS 1.5 where sprays were actually very popular so I constantly used them as well as the whole community, I understand why you cannot use custom ones. Blizzard knows what CS had to deal with and i agree with that approach for the most part. I bet I am not the only one who thinks like that.

Scott John Harrison
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Scott John Harrison

Here is what I would do: Every box contains 1 Skin (I look cool), 1 Emote/Victory Pose/Highlight Real (Character pose stuff), 1 Voice Line/Spray/Icon (Show off to your team mates stuff), 1 Money (Save up for what you want).

I would also increase the duplicate pay out to 60% so you getting at least 15 money for the cheapest items.

Sherrif
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Sherrif
I would put voice lines with poses too… What I kind of wish was that more of the current emote wheel was just hotkeys, and that you could put several emotes and voice lines in the wheel. I’d rather be able to just hit “thanks” in the middle of a fight when I get some clutch heal or save, rather than fumble with the wheel. I think the loot system is fine, I would also say that the RNG appears to be pretty fair. I typically get 1 thing I like from every box. In fact I’d kill for some… Read more »
Gazatteer
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Gazatteer
They’re a cool little image that you can throw down for fun or show off or use to taunt someone. So, meeting the intended use, I think? Some of them are just little “I was here” thingies that feature cute versions of the character you’re playing, some of them are actively for taunting other players (I posted DV.a’s “Salt” spray up above, actually — if you throw it down immediately after killing someone they see it in the kill cam). My favourite is from a character named Symmetra, who can set up multiple small turrets — one of her sprays… Read more »
Magmafrost13 .
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Magmafrost13 .

Based on evidence from other games which allow played to import sprays though, people spraying racism or porn simply doesn’t happen that often.
“Some of them are just little “I was here” thingies” this is why I prefer the idea of having your own personal sprays. Nothing about these sprays is specific to the player. It doesn’t say “*I* was here”, it says “a Blizzard customer was here”. Like I said before maybe if there were enough sprays for duplicates to be very rare, but clearly that isn’t the case.

Artemiy
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Artemiy

At least make it really high-quality stuff. Recolor skins and simplistic sprays should be handed out like free lollipops.

Liara Ashlynn Jennings
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Liara Ashlynn Jennings

Ah, probability. Thou art a fickle fucking bitch. It’d maybe be a bit better if they noticed when you get shit drops and upped your chances to get something actually worth a damn, but. It’s still really fucking shit.

Sherrif
Guest
Sherrif

Made me wonder if he reviewed XCOM 2.

Ryuuken
Guest

Level 26 or 27 and finally got my second legendary.
My best box was three rares and an epic.
Epic currency, Rare emote or pose, Rare voice and Duplicate rare icon.
Friend of mine got a Legendary and three Rares.

I think a little currency per level or at level milestones would be cool; or a little currency guaranteed per box; or maybe even currency for a first win, and that’s it?

sillyskeleton
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sillyskeleton

At least D.Va has cool legendary skins. My snow gear Zarya is so lame…
I’ll give the game this one little compliment, though: The best sprays (‘cute’ and ‘pixel’) are really fun to unlock through the achievement system.

Gary Walaszewski
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Gary Walaszewski
I’ve had similar bad luck, though I got lucky and got an ‘epic’ skin for Mercy, my main support hero and main hero overall. That got me pretty happy, all things considered. Look at the bright side, maybe the next level you’ll get a few hundred coins and can drop a thou on a legendary skin you’re actually after? Only one I’ve gotten was for Pharah and while that motivated me to play as her (which turned out to be a blast) I’d actually rather trade down for say, the Anubis costume. I do think this system doesn’t hurt my… Read more »
Jamesworkshop
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Jamesworkshop

only skin that matters

getting duplicates in a system with over 1000 unlocks is ridiculous, feels bad man.

Sapphire Crook
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Sapphire Crook

It’s like 4 per, right?
That’s still 250 boxes MINIMUM to get all 1000, excluding the dupes and currency drops.
WTF man.

Scott John Harrison
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Scott John Harrison

It is 284 boxes excluding duplicates…and “We are giving you money” having money in the boxes is basically a Willy Wonka saying “You get nothing! You lose, Good day sir.”

Sapphire Crook
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Sapphire Crook

What a great incentive to keep playing. Nothing motivates people but a firm slap across the cheek by a gross old man with soggy cookies.

I’m not saying the game doesn’t have other reasons to keep playing, just that the loot system falls short of being cohesive.

jamesbrnhll
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jamesbrnhll

Four duplicates in a box is a regular occurance for me, and I’ve only unlocked half of the game

Sperium3000
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Sperium3000

See, the problem is you have such a low opinion of anything that is not a legendary skin. Sure sprays aren’t as cool as skins, but I don’t see why you’d say they’re completely worthless. Also profile images are cool. I got this six-arm cowboy one that’s super sick.

dpunk3
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dpunk3

When you don’t get more than 1 legendary skin in 33 levels, I think you’re allowed to have low opinions of anything that isn’t something you’ve gotten 1/132 times.

Steven Thomas
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Steven Thomas

Yeah but Jim also is kinda underselling the other drops. I like throwing up my sprays with the rest of the team or on payloads, and voice lines are the closest thing to a usable and friendly taunt in the game (emotes take far too long.)

Sperium3000
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Sperium3000

Then play the game until you get it! The argument seems to be the progression system is not needed because playing the game is its own reward, then what’s the problem with just playing the game?

Slumberjack
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Slumberjack

…I kinda like that banana spray…and that twisted smiley face one…I wish I had those…

Even Luck
Guest
Even Luck

Jeez, how much more worthless can these forced microtransactions get?

Moon1337
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Moon1337

Horse armor. never forget horse armor

kripto sporidium
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kripto sporidium

Might be because I’m a fighting game person, but I actually like the recolors. hell, there’s some characters who I honestly think look better with recolors with any of their supposed legendaries (I love you, Soldier 76, but christ are your legendaries all garbage)

Slumberjack
Guest
Slumberjack

Got the recolor for him where his jacket looks like brown leather rather than a particularly shitty motorcycle jacket, will never use any other skin

Abdeel Morales López
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Abdeel Morales López

Purple Mei’s skins are fucking rad

Roler42
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Roler42

Remember when skins used to be sold as little DLC add-on and not this worthless gamble?

Sperium3000
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Sperium3000

You mean this free gamble? That you can do for free?

ʟυᴄαѕ⁰⁴⁵¹
Guest
ʟυᴄαѕ⁰⁴⁵¹
I’m level 34, and I’ve opened one legendary skin + 300 gold or so. At that rate, I’d need to reach level 2000 or something to get all the legendary skins. I don’t even want them all, but it’s just completely ridiculous. I really love Overwatch as a game, but the loot crate system is a complete mess. People have been comparing it to Hearthstone, but that game is free to play and all the cards you get can be used for something, even if it’s just for a bad joke deck. What are you even gonna do with a… Read more »
dpunk3
Guest
dpunk3

I think dups should be given full value of the item. If you’re gonna be forced to continue getting items you already have (especially at the higher levels and more items unlocked), giving the value of the duplicate item still nets you a way of getting whatever you want.

Steven Thomas
Guest
Steven Thomas

Full is actual insanity. If I got full money for a thing I bought and returned that would be bad. There shouldn’t reallllly be duplicates at all considering all of the potential unlocks, but half the value rounded up or down should be a sufficient payback.

qorl123
Guest
qorl123

“If I got full money for a thing I bought and returned that would be Bad” Why? Especially since it is a digital good. Yesterday I bought a pc mouse, didn’t like it, returned it, and I got the full price back.

Scott John Harrison
Guest
Scott John Harrison

You know that getting full money back for something you returned unused – It is called a Refund.

Scott John Harrison
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Scott John Harrison

People over at polygon calculated it around 800 boxes…but the more I look at people talking about it I think they underestimated it.

Michael Gram
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Michael Gram

It’s because you’re an atheist and don’t pray to RNGesus :p Seriously though, you’ve gotten a disproportionate amount of junk compared to me (my level’s a bit higher than yours and I’ve gotten 4 Legendary skins and 3 Epics) and that’s not fair.

At least they think this system can let them keep new maps and heroes free. If that turns out to be true in practice I won’t be too motivated to complain.

Andrew Butt
Guest
Andrew Butt

Wow :S That is shit luck. I’m only level 20 and I’ve gotten 3 or 4 legendary skins now, though not for any of the characters I play; still better then all those sprays… I hope your luck improves somewhat, and at least the game is usually really fun 🙂

Batnut1992
Guest
Batnut1992

Ah jeez, I’m picking up the game next week and gotta say, this aspect I am definitely not looking forward to, least everything else is ship shape right?

Dan9000
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Dan9000

Yeah it’s amazing. The boxes are down to luck though, I’m lvl50 and have 8 legendary skins and a few others. Still, the game is so good you won’t really be thinking loot boxes.

MrCas222
Guest
MrCas222

there needs to be a small gold reward for playing games or a hearthstone
quest system

Duster
Guest
Duster

I’ve only been following the Overwatch scene from a distance, so I was shocked when I first heard that currency in this game was a random drop. That’s hardly much of a currency system at all.

Kelerak
Guest
Kelerak

I wonder if there’ll be someone in the comments who will blame it on you playing on the PS4.

Travis Boswell
Guest

*puts ear to the ground to hear the stampede of PC gamers*

Jim Sterling
Guest

They can suck it.

Slumberjack
Guest
Slumberjack

If I could play shooters on anything but m+kb, I’d probably snag it on ps4 for funsies, but I am trash at aiming with a controller. Would be especially fun to remote play OW on my Vita

Nitrium
Guest
Nitrium

Apparently on consoles they have a thing called “auto-aim”, which basically sounds like cheating to me.

Richard Cadman
Guest
Richard Cadman

If everyone has it it’s a level playing field *shrug*

Notsowisesage
Guest
Notsowisesage

Nah, buh. I play PC, can confirm bunch’a crap sprays and duplicates.

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